Sick and Tired....

It started in the afternoon.... I was feeling a bit tired and draggy. By dinner time I was fearing that I was heading for trouble. By bedtime I was sure of it.... I was ill. I thought I would give it some time and see if I could shake it but, by 10:00 p.m. I was in a lot of pain and had a fever and chills. I knew I was going to need antibiotics. I gave in and came inside. I started myself on some meds that we had for emergencies and climbed into my own bed inside the house, under blankets and very near the bathroom facilities.
I felt defeated in a way. I rationalized that there is a difference in rising to meet a personal challenge and completely losing your marbles. I began to think - how I could have equipped myself properly to stay outdoors in such a situation. I realized I lacked adequate shelter and bathroom facilites in realistically close proxcimity to my shelter.
Nevertheless, as I lay shivering and in pain under my blankets in my own real bed, I was very thankful for a dry home, a warm dry bed and a master bathroom only 4 feet from my bedside.
I felt somewhat better the next day, but allowed myself to take an indoor bath (it was still raining outdoors) and to accept a ride to work from my hubby. I worked all day and was tired again at 5:00. I let Larry pick up dinner at the local eatery and I luxuiated all evening curled up on the real leather couch, under warm blankets in my lovely family room and slept for a second night in my bed indoors.
This morning I woke and had my coffee inside at my kitchen table while watching the news on TV. I looked around me and figured, this is it, I've given up. I've learned all I needed to from my outdoor experiment and I don't need to finish out the month. "Twenty -two Days in a Tent" sounds better for a book title than "Thirty-one Days in a Tent" does anyway. So, I went out to retrieve my granola for breakfast from my outpost kitchen and to my surprise found there on the outdoor kitchen counter, a bucket full of bags of chocolates (thankfully all preserved in plastic wrapping) The chocolate fairy had been there. I was moved by the kindness and thoughfulness of a friend who went out of their way to encourage me. I stood there in the drizzling rain and looked around at my wet and soggy backyard outpost and then looked into the windows of my warm lovely home and contemplated what to do. Go back inside - or return to the Outpost. It only took a few minutes to come to a decision. I grabbed some newspaper and the few sticks of dry kindling and started a fire in the wood stove to heat bathwater. It was about 47 degrees out and I could see my breath in the air. I thought to myself, "This is gonna be a chilly 2gallon bath" and it was! But, I managed. I had my granola outdoors, took my antibiotics and got dressed for work. I'm back in the saddle again .... fueled by chocolate and the love and encouragment of friends.
I got here to work this morningn and my boss told me she had cooked my dinner to bring to me tonight. Others are showing me love and support in lots of ways. How can I give up now?
Thank you all....Love, Kate

It Was a Wild Ride

I was fueled by love and chocolate yesterday to continue my "wild ride" of the outpost experiment. But the 3rd night of cold rainy weather dampened my spirits and I headed home after work with dread of going out to my windy, cold, wet paito to sit and wait till I had the courage to make a dash to my damp tent to try to get warm enough to go to sleep. I thought about it a little and said, NO WAY! It's finished....Kate's Outpost is over.
I believe I have learned what I needed to know...
*I could do it if I wanted to with the right shelter and equipment.
*I have most of the skills I would need to live OTG (off the grid)
*The romance of the life-style has been realistically contained in my mind
*I'm not going to run away to live in the mountains any time soon
*I hate lots of cold rainy weather, so Seattle will not be one of my pick cities for future retirement.
* I have a great husband
*I have some really supportive and loving friends and family
*We take most of what we have for granted
*I'll be much more aware of what I consume, waste ...throw away
*I should always explore my dreams rather than stifling them

So, I'm signing off... Thanks again to all of you who have cheered me on. I'm a little disapointed that I did not make the full month goal but I'm satisfied with what I accomplished.
Dream on everybody,
KATE